


Frozen in This Place

by redeyedwrath



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Canon Compliant, Coming Out, Light Angst, M/M, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-20
Updated: 2019-10-20
Packaged: 2020-12-24 11:54:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,467
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21099041
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/redeyedwrath/pseuds/redeyedwrath
Summary: "Sylvain is like he always is, smiling and flirting, posture relaxed. His unnamed partner is gesturing wildly, her shoulders tense as her arm draws back -She slaps him. Felix draws in a breath."In which Felix creeps around the monastery at night, Sylvain has girl issues, and there are a lot of feelings.





	Frozen in This Place

**Author's Note:**

> OH BOY. So I bought this game, not knowing what I was going to get into, because I love turn-based RPGs. And then I fell in love with Claude von Riegan. And then I played Blue Lions and saw Sylvain and Felix's A+-Support and went "hhhhh gay."
> 
> Aaaaand now we're here. Y'all know I love semi-angsty pretentious gay stuff, so that's what you get haha. I hope y'all enjoy it!!!

_'Cause I'm trying to be brave now_  
_But I'm frozen in this place now_  
_And it's so cold_  
_To feel like I wanted to_  
_To be like I wanted to  
_

**— Dusk (Dark is Descending), Anathema**

* * *

It’s dark in the monastery when Felix creeps down the stairs. Everyone has gone to bed; it’s way past midnight, but Felix can’t sleep. Some of the torches still smolder, extinguished by the frigid winds, casting warped shadows on the stone. 

This is when Felix likes Garreg Mach most: when it’s devoid of people, cold and uninviting, where no one will even think to bother him. He knows his way to the training grounds by heart now, knows how to move to make the least noise, knows how to keep in the shadows. In the end, those reflexes are what save him as he hears talking outside the dormitory. 

Shit. He holds his breath. If he’s seen, he’ll undoubtedly be lectured by Mercedes in the morning. The professor won’t scold him, just look at him with that blank stare that Felix knows means disappointment. He’s not in the mood for either of those things. 

Carefully, he peeks around the corner. The courtyard is empty, as always, save for two figures illuminated by the scarce light of the greenhouse. It’s hard to make out any features like this, when they’re cloaked in the dark, but…

He’d know that red hair, those shoulders, the collar bones that show through the v-neck of his unbuttoned shirt anywhere. Felix _knows_ those eyes, _knows_ those tendons, those bones, that smile. Perhaps better than he’d like to admit. 

Felix shivers in sympathy — he _does_, he tells himself. Despite the cold, Sylvain still hasn’t rolled his sleeves down or closed his jacket. He’ll catch a cold like this, will probably moan to Felix and Ingrid and Dimitri and anyone who will listen about it tomorrow. 

But — as Felix’s eyes glide over his forearms, his collarbones, his _face_ — he knows why. 

Sylvain is talking to a woman. Of course he is. There’s no other reason for Sylvain to be out here, looking like he does, that goddess-damned smile on his face — the one that makes Felix want to puke and claw at Sylvain until he stops doing it. Sylvain is lucky he’s nowhere close to the training grounds, or Felix would be tempted to grab a sword and just run him through. 

Though, judging by the tone of the conversation Sylvain’s having with the woman, he won’t need to. Sylvain is like he always is, smiling and flirting, posture relaxed. His unnamed partner is gesturing wildly, her shoulders tense as her arm draws back —

She slaps him. Felix draws in a breath. 

Instantly, Sylvain’s demeanor changes. His shoulders droop, hand raised to hold his cheek — Felix likes him like this. He’s so focused on Sylvain that he barely registers the girl running off, presumably back to the village. Sylvain’s just staring off in the distance, frowning, the hand that isn’t at his face wrapped around his middle.

Felix doesn’t know how long he stands in the doorway to the dormitory, frozen, just watching Sylvain. Sylvain’s thumb swipes back and forth over the abused skin of his cheek, making slow, lazy arcs, absorbed in his thoughts. Felix clenches his hand into a fist, tempted to… just hit something. 

He should’ve just continued on to the training grounds. He never should’ve stopped to watch Sylvain. And yet… 

Sylvain turns around, finally, and Felix jumps, caught in his gaze. They freeze. Sylvain’s thumb stops moving. His eyebrow raises, his shoulders tense. Felix just… stands there. 

“Felix!” Sylvain says, just as Felix contemplates running up and hitting him, just to do something. That smile is back. His posture relaxed. 

Felix rolls his eyes. “Still on your little escapades, I see.” 

“Aw, come on,” Sylvain says, moving towards him. Suddenly, Felix is aware that he’s now standing in the doorway, trapped between Sylvain and the dormitory; now the only thing he can do is run back to his bedroom. Or possibly murder Sylvain, which Felix seriously considers when Sylvain _winks _at him. “It’s only a little bit of fun.”

Felix is unable to keep the sneer off his face. “_Fun_.”

Sylvain hums, leaning against the wall nonchalantly. He wiggles his eyebrows, smirking at Felix. The stone must be freezing right now — Felix is shivering even with a coat on — but it doesn’t seem to bother Sylvain. Felix rolls his eyes, then keeps them trained on Sylvain’s stupid face, and does _not_ let them drift down. 

If Sylvain hadn’t been so preoccupied with being a dumbass right now, Felix might’ve been tempted to… do something stupid. Like offer to warm him up. Or give him his coat. 

Fortunately, the next thing that comes out of Sylvain’s mouth is, “You should try it some time, Felix! I can set you up with someone — I promise even _you’ll_ find it fun.” 

“Goddess!” Felix bites out before he can stop himself. “Are you really this stupid or are you just pretending?”

Shit. Felix regrets it immediately. Sylvain looks taken aback, eyebrows raised, mouth hanging open, and Felix just… just…

This is such a bad idea. Why did he even mention anything. He pinches the bridge of his nose, trying to calm himself, but he can feel his heart racing, it’s pounding in his head. He wishes he had a sword with him. 

“Sylvain,” he says. He wants to bash his head against the wall. Or Sylvain’s head. “Sylvain. I’m. Not. _Interested_.”

“Oh,” Sylvain breathes, eyes wide. He straightens up, and now they’re standing right in front of each other. Sylvain is towering over him, and then Felix’s eyes are on his collar bones, and if Sylvain moves Felix is going to break something. Instead, Sylvain continues, “_Oh_. Felix, I —”

Felix _hmph_s, hoping his face isn’t too red, hopes he isn’t acting too shifty. He crosses his arms, fingers clenched in the crooks of his elbows and just… breathes for a second. Sylvain could’ve been insufferable about it, could’ve sneered and walked away. Instead, Sylvain is staring at him, an unreadable look in his eyes. He doesn’t know which is worse. 

Felix clenches his jaw, and musters up the will to say, “Shut up. Just… don’t ask me again.”

“Well,” Sylvain drawls — and there it is again, that damned smile, Goddess, this was such a bad idea. Even before Sylvain continues, Felix knows it’s going to be bad news, just by the twinkle in his eyes and the way Sylvain leans into him. “There must be _someone_ you’re interested in.” 

They’re so close. They’re so _close_. Sylvain is bending down a bit, his breath washes over Felix and he shivers — it’s the cold, it’s the _cold_, it’s not _him_. Sylvain radiates warmth, and he smells like flowery perfume but underneath that is… Felix clenches his jaw until his ears nearly pop. It would be so easy to do something stupid right now. This close, he can see the red mark the girl’s palm left on Sylvain’s cheek, and Felix flashes back to Sylvain’s thumb on that skin. It would be so easy to place his own thumb there, to soothe the heated flesh with his cold hands. 

It would be so _easy_. 

Instead, Felix takes a breath, and says, “Goodnight.” 

Then he turns on his heel, and he’s not fleeing — he _isn’t_ — he’s merely walking quickly. Dignified. Back to his room. And away from Sylvain, with that hair, those shoulders, those collar bones. 

Goddess, his face feels like it’s on fire. Felix is sure he’s never invoked Seiros’ title as much as he did these past few minutes. 

“No wait!” Sylvain says, his footsteps thundering up the stairs and through the hallway as he attempts to catch up to Felix. “I want to know who it is!”

There’s no way Felix is going to tell him. His heart is pounding as he runs down the corridor, counting down the doors till he reaches his own bedroom. He throws it open and runs inside, but not before Sylvain’s fingers brush his elbow, shit —

“I said good_night_.”

He slams the door shut. Sylvain’s face is burned into his brain, frozen into shock and a sort of awful comprehension that makes Felix sag against the door in a moment of weakness. He’s fine. Sylvain couldn’t even figure out that he didn’t like women, he probably wouldn’t figure this out either. 

Felix is fine. 

The footsteps move away from his door, and he lets out a breath, listening to Sylvain pad down the hallway until he reaches his own bedroom. He waits there, forehead against the door, heart pounding in his ears, until he’s calmed down. 

Goddess. What a terrible idea that was. And he hadn’t even gotten to the training grounds. 

**Author's Note:**

> So that was it!!! I hope it was alright, this is the first thing I've written in like ten months so I'm a bit rusty. Huge thank you to Evie, Lex, and Euphemia from the Sylvix Discord for looking over this for me and making so many suggestions, I really owe you guys ^^
> 
> If you liked this, please let me know what you thought!!! I'm eager to hear what y'all have to say, maybe you guys can even convince me to write more for these two idiots [eyes emoji]
> 
> Uuuh also, I just made a FE3H twitter so like, maybe consider following me on there if you want? [Here you go!](https://twitter.com/reverethedeer)


End file.
